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Recently, a friend said to me, "Men and women can't be
friends." He was referring to the movie, "When Harry Met Sally," in
which Harry and Sally start off by being practically best friends,
but eventually they end up in a relationship together. I've been
thinking about this ever since my sage friend proclaimed his
bit of wisdom. In elementary school, all my friends were
girls of course. Guys never entered my head and if they did,
it would most probably have been in a negative light. I barely talked
to guys, so when I had to one day, I stuttered and stammered my way
through one brief sentence. Needless to say, I tried to avoid getting
into a conversation with them for quite a while. I grew out of
that embarrassing habit by sixth or seventh grade. I could
converse with them normally, but I didn't have close guy friends.
Although, in eighth grade, I did have my first boyfriend. It was fun
to be attached, a new experience.
After that, I just wanted to know guys as friends;
less obligations. Now, I have several good male friends. Sometimes, I
think hanging out with guys is more fun. There aren't secrets going
around in a group, no distinct alliances, and no petty quarrels
springing up out of nowhere. One thing I can give credit to the guys,
they're more direct and much easier to understand.
Sometimes, even I can't figure out what's going on with my own
gender.
I think it's wonderful to have guy friends and totally
possible. Of course, there might be that problem of attraction and
stuff like that, but I don't think that's such a big deal. I mean, if
both sides really "just wanted to be friends," the friendship would
happen on its own. Sometimes, being friends first is the
best thing for a relationship; I bet Harry and Sally end up getting
married.
I like talking to my guy friends because I can just
be really weird and not feminine at all and it doesn't bother them.
In fact, we just joke around with each other a lot. Plus, there's
that bonus of getting to talk to them about other guys and getting
the male perspective on everything. I guess what I'm really
comparing male friends to is a boyfriend. I'm not saying that having
a boyfriend is a drag, for some people, it's the thing they've been
waiting for their whole lives. With a guy I have a crush on, I get
really nervous because I want to present the best side of myself;
understandable. But it's always a relief to have around those
guys with whom I can just be a total goof.
I guess what I wanted to say was that males and
females add different aspects to a friendship. Good friends from both
sides balance each other out, and I'm lucky enough to have both male
and female friends that make my life a quirky and entertaining little
journey.
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