truth

4:07 p.m.

Wow, I don’t know whether or not I just had a blast or just been through an experiment. It was as though I had volunteered to be a human test subject for a new shampoo product or test drug. The result is that I am among the 10 percentile who did not have the supposed reaction, and the drug is not recommended for me. Except the trial was to expose myself to the lake water. You know, if something looks toxically contaminated, it’s probably because it is. Although honestly, it was not as though I totally went against my instincts and went into the lake. It was more like I was thrown into it… twice.

The first incident—

The 7 of us were on a sailboat and all was going well, until we became stranded near the middle of the lake because there was no wind. After about 20 minutes when it was definite that there was no wind, we waited another 10 because nobody wanted to go to plan B. We eventually took out the oars and started paddling towards the far, far, far away shore. There might’ve been a chance for survival but the little kids wanted to help out also.

And that’s how we lost the first oar.

The other one broke shortly after.

Next comes the tossing overboard part.

After trying to splash the boat back to shore in vain, I learned that there was a plan C when the kind and gentle Kyle threw me into the waters of hell to help push the boat back to shore.

I don’t mind being thrown over as much as the position that I landed. Yeah-massive belly flop. With a couple gulps of greeny pee-colored water.

Second experience of heaven—

Was similar to the first. Kyle dragged me from the car’s safe haven and swung me in. Kyle, Kyle, Kyle. Needs to be enrolled into some sort of program or institution.